can’t bear the roosters crow
I guess it’s something that you already know
Remember the darkness bless the light
Lest I fall into the night
You might think I’m crazy, crazy like a fox
You might think I’m soft but I’m hard as a rock
I got something , something called fire
I got something take my spirit higher
Stopped wearing black I am tired of look thin
I got a big fat spirit walking born again
Got to get humble going to wash your feet
Got to feed the beggar down on poor’s man street
Like a saint I walk on water, turn water into wine
Turn the other cheek, give my eyes to the blind
Crazy by Bride
Well I went to court today and got my restraining order against the man-who-wishes-he had-never-met-me At least that’s what the note under my door claims but he claims he didn’t write the note or so his lawyer told me. Lawyer? Yup, he had a lawyer there representing him and she wanted to settle the matter before we got to the judge. He would agree to everything I wanted for one year.
At first I said no, I wanted to go before the judge because I wanted to know about this note and my blogs disappearing for several days. Ms Lawyer (yes he got a female lawyer!) said she would not allow him to testify. WTF! The person who was with me said the judge couldn’t make him testify and couldn’t do anything about my blogs anyway and I couldn’t prove he had anything to do with the note or my blogs so I should negotiate. SHIT FuCK DAMN!
OK then sucker 2 years! I could hear him getting pissed and whining about that because he would have to take another elevator if I was in the one he wanted blah blah blah and he couldn’t eat at the Senior Center (he never eats there, he just walks through and stares at everyone). I did concede that he could go to classes during that time period but that he had to stay out of the dining area. I could have made things much worse for him. Much worse.
Now, I’m willing to believe he didn’t “write” the note but I’m willing to bet cash he knows who in hell did and how it got under my door. I’m willing to bet he had “nothing to do with my blogs playing hide and seek” but I’m willing to bet cash he knows who did and he was told all about it before it happened. I’m willing to bet the reason he had a lawyer with him is to protect those other people more than it was to protect himself.
Those other people are an amorphous group of men and women whose identities I am not quite certain of. I am sure that some of them live on the premises but I am also certain that not all of them do. I think of them as a consortium of individuals known collectively and somewhat affectionately at times as The Gremlins. Today I believe I am promoting them to Troglodytes. At least some of them.
I believe that there might have been some meddling going on that got my admirer thinking I was more interested than I was and then got him even more upset than he needed to be when his overtures did not work. I think I know exactly who that twit of a meddler was. He’s a sociopathic snake in the grass who can’t resist causing trouble for others. A troglodyte who looks good on the outside but is so putrid on the inside one or two pokes reveals the stech of psychic decay. He’s supposed to be moving out soon and it can’t come soon enough. If I get a chance, I will confront him about this and then I will go to the building manager about it.
But the other troglodytes are much more onerous and dangerous. I believe there are burglars living on the premises. There are so many complaints about break-ins and theft it’s ridiculous. The management says they can’t do anything, call the police. The police say they can’t do anything until you actually catch somebody in the act. Right. The cops don’t pay much attention to complaints from people here at the Three Threes. You are automatically labeled neurotic simply by virtue of your address and posibly psychotic. Complaints like this are dismissed out of hand.
I think the main reason for the break-ins is because of the computers in the building. I’ve “lost” six (or is it 7–I’m beginning to lose count) computers to viruses/trojans that none of the big gun virus/trojan detectors out there can detect or figure out how to remove. I’ve spent hundres of dollars trying to keep thme out and/or get rid of them. Basically I don’t really control this computer–they do. They allow me to use it if I behave myself and don’t try to do anything to get rid ogf them or talk about them. I am writing this in Word because when I tried to writ it online, the sentences about burglars living in the building got edited out.
Why do they want the computers. It’s some kind of cyber crime. I wish I understood computers better but what from what I do understand I believe they are turning other people’s computers into some kind of conduit (servers?) for information out into the internet. I’ve found evidence of what looks like credit cards and telephone numbers to Asia and Europe. They seem to be using Telnet.
It’s really amusing to write things that mess with their heads and watch them run around in circles being pissed as hell at me. They’ll do something they think will punish me. Like steal my blogs away again. Of course this time I will go to the cops. I might not get anywhere but since I have a job working on the internet and they may have cost me that job already, this has now become serious shit. So I double dog dare you, you idiots. Besides they’ll go straight to Mr Can’t-Take-No-For-An-Answer for answers. Any questions?
They could take my TV remote again. As if getting up and walking all of 8 feet is a huge hardship. They’ll bring it back later just to make me feel foolish anyway. What else? Oh they could move things around. Steal my kids pictures.Search the house for god knows what. Steal my sewing supplies. Eat my food while they are here. Use up all the ice cubes and don’t make any new ones. Rude ass people. Kill my plants. Why that was so appealing I don’t know but they put some mighty foul smelling shit in the pots.
But you know what, I ain’t gonna let none of that shit piss me off or hurt my feelings. If I let them control my emotions then they win. Wasting my energy on getting pissed off is foolish. I have better things to do like tring to figure out what they are up to and why they are so interested in being in my apartment doing nasty stuff to me. It started out as payback for something and I’m not even sure what. That part I don’t care about.
It’s the computer stuff that is so fascinating. You would not believe what I have learned about computers. They have rendered so many machines with windows inoperable right off the bat that I am really going to have to learn Linux. At the moment I am too lazy–better things to do. Tired of playing with PCs.
Yes, I know this sounds crazy. The rantings of an insane woman. God I wish it was. I could take a pill and make it all go away.