Still Grieving After All This Time...

When griping grief the heart doth wound,
and doleful dumps the mind opresses,
then music, with her silver sound,
with speedy help doth lend redress.

William Shakespeare (1564 – 1616)

I’m feeling really good these past few days in spite of some frickenfracken (I love these curse words that come from a children’s story!) pain. I feel emotionally grounded…happy in spite of some heavy duty grieving. It’s odd, really. But it’s a letting go I think or maybe just a recognition and acceptance of my love for Skip, embracing it really in a very public way. Whatever, it feels good.

I’m writing very well in my opinion and the opinion of some people I respect immensely in the community here. People who write song lyrics and get PAID to perform. The folks over at The Isthmus and Madison.com I really just feel so honored to be recognized and appreciated by all of them.

Here’s a poem that seemed to practically fall into my lap day before yesterday. Actually its Granny Rap. I’ve really made very few changes to it:

Still Grief

Grief because I can’t just drive
away from here, leave behind time
and drive away,away from here.
I’m thinking time
won’t take away my sorrow,
I’ll still be here wanting you again tomorrow…
I never expected to be in this world
without you there somewhere there
waiting there, somewhere there,
Somewhere there waiting there waiting there…

God I wish that YOU were there, still there
waiting there, still there waiting there for me
and I could find you there still waiting there.
or you could find me here, still waiting here ,
still waiting for you,still waiting here,
still here waiting here….

Grief, because when you left you left
me behind and you know that ain’t fair
‘Cuz I looked for you and you weren’t there
You weren’t there waiting there waiting where
You always were, you left me here, waiting here
You left me all alone in this bad old world
Still waiting here, here waiting here
and sometimes I feel just like a little girl.

God, I wish that YOU were there, still there
waiting there, still there waiting there for me
and I could find you there still waiting there.
or you could find me here, still waiting here ,
still waiting for you,still waiting here,
still here waiting here….

I never thought I’d end up here in this cold world
Waiting here without you waiting there somewhere
there waiting there waiting waiting there somewhere
God I wish that you were there, still there still there
somewhere waiting there waiting there
and I would find you waiting there, waiting anywhere
ore you would find me here still waiting here,
just waiting here for you here, waiting here.

God, I wish that YOU were there, still there
waiting there, still there waiting there for me
and I could find you there still waiting there.
or you could find me here, still waiting here ,
still waiting for you,still waiting here,
still here waiting here….

I never expected to be waiting here, here all alone
all alone on my own
all alone.

Barbara Gavin-Lewellyn

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